three days before birthday, i realise how important my family means to me.

I celebrated my birthday at ice cream 1-1 buffet today. I starved myself practically since day before in order to enjoy the moment, but I was quite wrong. 'Cause when I went there I just gorged on a lot alot of ice cream and cakes, sounds good but you'll get really sick of it after a while, esp since I havent eaten for a long time.

And my brother and mom bought me presents each. I was really really happy cause my mom bought me a really nice wallet, but since I　already ordered one, I told her I didn't need it. And I felt really sad cause it was meant to be a surprise which my mom was quite excited about, and I just burst her bubble by telling her that. So we went to exchange it but everything was so ex so I decided to just forgo this bdae present and got my mom to buy what she wanted instead. I feel so guilty because I've been quite mean to my mom recently and yup Im really happy that she got me such a wonderful present this year. But i wasn't able to appreciate it.

Halfway thru the shopping thing, I felt really terrible - like nauseating and my stomach hurt a lot. It was a really torturous experience and I shan't elaborate how it was. It was so terrible and I've never experience so much uncomfort and pain over a few hours before. I wanted to much to go home but the journey home was so long and miserable. My dad got me medicine, my brother was so sweet and kept asking how I felt and I got medicated oil to help tide me over. After I was well again, I felt so thankful to finally feel normal and okay.

At night I freaked out over BSP again cause I wasn't feeling well today and slept quite a lot. Then I got my dad to help me again, like explain to me and talked to me about it so I wouldn't sulk over memorising it without any understanding at all. Sigh sometimes I trouble my dad so much I feel really bad. Cause he ferries me around, ferries my friends around and helps me with work, piano, stress etc etc so much since young.

thank you~